lastfatality09
New Member
I'm looking for a very special kind of book that corresponds with my current state of mind, first of all, I never ever read except when I need to for school. The last book that I read was a compilation of poems by Baudelaire and the ones that inspired me the most were the "heavy" ones about his melancholy or spleen and his constant search of words to express it.
I've always been very melancholic, despite being an extreme extrovert when I'm with people, as soon as I'm alone with my feelings this unexplicable state of sadness kicks in. After reading the works of Baudelaire I realised that I'm kind of like him in a way, my spleen, my sadness is my inspiration and I'd like to explore it.
My problem is that I have a lot of trouble expressing this feeling through writing, I feel overwhelmed and I also feel that I lack the bases to write. I'm an acoustic guitar player and I love to sing but it feels like there is a barrier between my feelings and the words that come out of my mouth. It's very easy to get carried away by rhymes and just use whatever sounds best but I want a more genuine approach to music, something that comes from the bottom of my heart.
So recently I've been thinking about reading, it can help me understand my feelings better and even create new ones, it can give me more inspiration, more bases to write my own songs or poems or even stories, I just want to explore my mind my melancholy.
One last thing I'd like to mention, I love philosophical subjects especially when it is stuff about life and death. I also really enjoyed some texts by Sartre in the my philosophy lessons.
What I'm saying is that I need help choosing something that goes with all of this. I can't do it by myself so I'm giving you this difficult task, please help me.
I've always been very melancholic, despite being an extreme extrovert when I'm with people, as soon as I'm alone with my feelings this unexplicable state of sadness kicks in. After reading the works of Baudelaire I realised that I'm kind of like him in a way, my spleen, my sadness is my inspiration and I'd like to explore it.
My problem is that I have a lot of trouble expressing this feeling through writing, I feel overwhelmed and I also feel that I lack the bases to write. I'm an acoustic guitar player and I love to sing but it feels like there is a barrier between my feelings and the words that come out of my mouth. It's very easy to get carried away by rhymes and just use whatever sounds best but I want a more genuine approach to music, something that comes from the bottom of my heart.
So recently I've been thinking about reading, it can help me understand my feelings better and even create new ones, it can give me more inspiration, more bases to write my own songs or poems or even stories, I just want to explore my mind my melancholy.
One last thing I'd like to mention, I love philosophical subjects especially when it is stuff about life and death. I also really enjoyed some texts by Sartre in the my philosophy lessons.
What I'm saying is that I need help choosing something that goes with all of this. I can't do it by myself so I'm giving you this difficult task, please help me.