Let's battle. Sharing your work

[Starchaser3000]

I would like to compare and contrast action or comedy scenes in just specially selected paragraphs. We can critique each other in a civil manner I hope. Being a smart alec is cool so long as we don't get personal OK. As I already mentioned, lets just stick to small paragraphs at a time because I don't want to bore anyone with a 5 page post to be judged because I sure as hell don't want to have to read that much either.

If I get some active participation, I promise I will try to match whatever anybody has.

 

[Polly Parrot]

Great idea! I'm not a writer myself but will happily look at what others post.

Maybe start with posting a teaser paragraph of your own?

 

[Starchaser3000]

This is a semi serious royal court room scene. Protagonist is on trial for blasphemous treason:

When some time had lapsed, the angered mob began to settle down. Then the emperor Louie suddenly changed his pose to stand upright on all fours. The entire court then became completely silent, and the head sage finally addressed Dope angrily with a tone of biased resentment.
“Do you continue to see this as a game? How dare you mock this court of your peers! You should know that your actions from past and present are being taken into account as evidence to convict you of the highest of treasons, in open defiance to your patron god!!”
Dope’s demeanor suddenly became serious and he froze with his knees buckling. With the emperor standing still and gazing directly into Dope’s eyes, the initial impact of the supernatural mind meld bonding gave him a very uneasy fear in his stomach and throat.
The head sage continued to angrily ramble curses at him, and then brought forth all the accusations he had compiled on Dope for the past several years of the aforementioned open defiance to the status quo. This court proceeding was specifically designed to discourage him from further participation against the rules and regulations of the great city for its never-changing rule over its subservient citizens. And on another separate formal conviction, unbeknown to Dope, he was also being accused of the most severe penalty for directly defying the emperor himself. Then the emperor shifted his attention to his paws and started to lick and clean them as the head sage ended his diatribe of Dope’s criminal transgressions.