• Welcome to BookAndReader!

    We LOVE books and hope you'll join us in sharing your favorites and experiences along with your love of reading with our community. Registering for our site is free and easy, just CLICK HERE!

    Already a member and forgot your password? Click here.

Suggestions for a title?

Vespertilio91

New Member
I wrote this last night but can't think of a title. Any ideas or comments would be greatly appreciated.

~Vesper!

I gazed at the stars as they fell from the sky.
I clasped the brightest star as she wept for me, dying.
I feel the desperate stars reclaiming me
Now as they cry--

I realized I never began.
 
Erm...that's a toughie.

Paradox, maybe? It's a little too simple, but a poem like this can't have a long title. It could wind up longer than the poem. I'll try to think of some later, because nothing comes to me now.
 
Just take a word from the poem and use it as the word if you can't find a title. It's what I do after typing up a 30 second quickie (that sounds like a porno, elohel - don'cha know?). Anyhow, Gaze or To The Stars would work. Or maybe, seeing as the emphasis seems to be more forwarded and direct in the final line, pick a word from there or a combination of words and use them as a title. Maybe "Realize."
 
Thanks very much for those suggestions; however, I do not feel any of them to be suited to it. I don't want the poem straightforward, hence why I say nothing about what it really means. I want something mysterious, and I'm afraid that what you've all come up with, though very brilliant, are not what I'm looking for. Thank you again, and please, don't be afraid to suggest more. It could wind up as the Right One.
 
As a side note:

The first and second line are in past tense, the third and fourth present tense, and the fith past tense. I'm not sure if you meant to do this, but it reads a little strange.

As for a title:

Something about rebirth, or a clensing perhaps. Maybe "Fallen"?
 
Revelation In the sense of enlightenment or as a Biblical reference.

Or something more enigmatic like Ante Mortem
 
As a side note:

The first and second line are in past tense, the third and fourth present tense, and the fith past tense. I'm not sure if you meant to do this, but it reads a little strange.

Actually I did. This takes place in two times: first the past when the first two lines reopen, then in the present with the second pair. The narrator had the first two happen to him and the second two are happening to him then. The last line is a recollection. He realizes something that happened in the past I never began so I put it in past as a accentuation of his recognition. I do hope this clears that up.

Occlith, I like your idea about Revelations but I just wrote one about that, and this isn't as much a revelation as it is a revealed secret, dark and life-changing, that claims hold on him. Ante Mortem does not seem correct, though, because of the fact that if you never begin, then there is no ending.

I am but the recorder of this continuing event. That is all I can say of now, but the beginning sagas are posted here. Check out anything I've written; it may be the beginning, or maybe nothing at all. :confused:
 
No, and I feel useless because I'm having Titler's Block. :( T_T Thanks for asking...

Maybe this will help with ideas, for me and anyone else: I'm writing a series of poems, a common story weaved in among them. I do not know, however, how long I will continue. I haven't even decided if what I've written is going to be the beginning, a middle piece, or the end. It's all jumbled up. This and Revelations are part of this series, as is La Reina de Mentiras, but I don't have their chronological order in place. I'm pretty sure that this one is between La Reina de Mentiras and Revelations with Revelations happening afterwards.
 
Yeah, the more I think about it, the less I like the "And Inspiration part." It's gone. Vamoose.

Insight

I gazed at the stars as they fell from the sky.
I clasped the brightest star as she wept for me, dying.
I feel the desperate stars reclaiming me
Now as they cry--

I realized I never began.
 
Back
Top