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Books you'd never let your kids read....
- Thread starter Rosie
- Start date
My parents never censored my reading, and I hated it when my school library did. It only made me go to a bookshop and buy the book myself.
I am of the view that banning something can (but doesn't always) make it more attractive. If I have kids I would hope that I could trust them to make appropriate reading choices.
When I was a child, I chose to read a lot of trash. One of my friends was forbidden from reading these by her mother. The result was she just read them when she came round to play at my house. It didn't do her, or me, any harm. In fact, it probably made me more discerning about what I read now (read: literature snob).
I am of the view that banning something can (but doesn't always) make it more attractive. If I have kids I would hope that I could trust them to make appropriate reading choices.
When I was a child, I chose to read a lot of trash. One of my friends was forbidden from reading these by her mother. The result was she just read them when she came round to play at my house. It didn't do her, or me, any harm. In fact, it probably made me more discerning about what I read now (read: literature snob).
i read It by Stephen King for the first time when i was in 6th grade, and though it is still one of my favorite books, i think i'd like my children to be a bit older than that when they decide they want to read this book, and others of this type. only because of the extreme violence and scariness and the detailed sexual content. plus i still have nightmares from it! there are some books i wish i would have read when i was younger though, such as Lord of the Flies which i read as a senior in high school, The Giver which i read as a freshman in high school, and i wish i would have been introduced to the philosophy of Carl G. Jung and others before i went to college.
i fully plan to read the harry potter series to my kids as soon as the youngest is old enough to understandthe difference between fantasy and reality.
so there's my opinion. sorry for blabbing on for such a time!
i fully plan to read the harry potter series to my kids as soon as the youngest is old enough to understandthe difference between fantasy and reality.
so there's my opinion. sorry for blabbing on for such a time!
Judy Blume (who, from that list has possibly the most challenged books per author this decade) quotes a letter from a child who wrote to her saying his mother had given him a book with some of the pages cut out, and she said it was a printing error. He just went to the library and read it there.
I don't believe in censorship. I read avidly as a child, and had a reading age many years beyond my actual age. I read anything i could get my hands on, and I am glad that my mother encouraged that in me.
You can't ban a child from reading a book. You can't be with them all the time, so you don't know if they will do ask you ask or not. Banning it just heightens emotions around it, and where it might have originally been read without problem is now read with the knowledge that this is a "bad" book, and seems to me, to be likely to have much more effect on the child.
Lynne
I don't believe in censorship. I read avidly as a child, and had a reading age many years beyond my actual age. I read anything i could get my hands on, and I am glad that my mother encouraged that in me.
You can't ban a child from reading a book. You can't be with them all the time, so you don't know if they will do ask you ask or not. Banning it just heightens emotions around it, and where it might have originally been read without problem is now read with the knowledge that this is a "bad" book, and seems to me, to be likely to have much more effect on the child.
Lynne
moggy
New Member
I wouldn't ban children from reading any books.. when I was young, my father made me explain the book to him, and he quizzed me on books, he didn't think were suitable for my age to read.
Him quizzing me, probably made me want to read them more, to prove a point to him, that i did understand books deemed for 'adults'.
Him quizzing me, probably made me want to read them more, to prove a point to him, that i did understand books deemed for 'adults'.
Jenem
kickbox
i have no children, my husband and i are still deciding on that issue; however, i'm very close to my nieces and nephew so i can relate somewhat to the parental concern related to "banning" books.
i can't say i would ban any books, but i would definitely let my child know that i don't want him/her to read a particular book until they were older and tell them why (it's too violent, etc). i dont think there's anything wrong with telling your child that you think that certain content is inappropriate for them. it's the same with movies and video games. of course, if your child is the type, they may sneak behind your back and do it anyway, but letting them know how you feel about it and why, is important. there is nothing wrong with not wanting your children to be exposed to issues they are not ready to deal with. the discussion is the key.
my parents never forbade me anything, and they didn't pay attention to my reading habits. when i was 10 or 11, i read one of my mom's jackie collins books that had a voodoo orgy in it (this wasn't the first collins' novel i read). i dont know why, but when i finished reading that part it scared the hell out of me and i thought i was going to hell. we weren't religious AT ALL, but the thought that i had read all this sex and black magic scared the daylights out of me. when i told my sister, she just laughed at me (even though i was crying). i got over it in about 2 weeks. it's safe for me to say that i wouldn't have minded if my mom had told me not to read that book til i was older. for the most part, i did what i was told when i was young.
i can't say i would ban any books, but i would definitely let my child know that i don't want him/her to read a particular book until they were older and tell them why (it's too violent, etc). i dont think there's anything wrong with telling your child that you think that certain content is inappropriate for them. it's the same with movies and video games. of course, if your child is the type, they may sneak behind your back and do it anyway, but letting them know how you feel about it and why, is important. there is nothing wrong with not wanting your children to be exposed to issues they are not ready to deal with. the discussion is the key.
my parents never forbade me anything, and they didn't pay attention to my reading habits. when i was 10 or 11, i read one of my mom's jackie collins books that had a voodoo orgy in it (this wasn't the first collins' novel i read). i dont know why, but when i finished reading that part it scared the hell out of me and i thought i was going to hell. we weren't religious AT ALL, but the thought that i had read all this sex and black magic scared the daylights out of me. when i told my sister, she just laughed at me (even though i was crying). i got over it in about 2 weeks. it's safe for me to say that i wouldn't have minded if my mom had told me not to read that book til i was older. for the most part, i did what i was told when i was young.
VTChEwbecca
kickbox
Jenem said:
That's how I feel...I have real issues with "banning" books outright. I think its more effective to have discussions about the books, and to perhaps read the book along with the child (if they insist upon reading it), which would hopefully spark discussions on the material that you find to be controversial.
rune
New Member
I'm not a parent, so not qaulified to advise on what parents should allow their kids to read.
I can however, mention that when I was younger, around 10 I started reading horror after my Mam let me stay up of a weekend to watch the Hammer Horror movies
I was reading James Herbert and Stephen King at that time and loved them. There is obviously a lot of violence in the books but that didnt bother me at all. I did feel a bit embarrased about the sex scenes if there were any, not because I was reading something that bothered me but more if my Dad had found out
He would have had a bird!
I read fantasy now because I got through most of the horror novels by the time I was in my early 20's And I really enjoy the genre but at times it does seem a bit tame compared to the stuff I was reading as a kid.
I think what I am trying to say is that I didn't have any ill affects of reading this stuff or watching horror movies when I was younger. I remember watching horror movies that scared the living daylights out of my parents when I was in my mid teens, but didn't scare me at all
I can understand that parents need to know what their kids are reading and watching, but once my parents found out I was interested in the gritty stuff and that I wasn't fazed by it they felt quite relaxed about it.
Some kids are more mature than others
I can however, mention that when I was younger, around 10 I started reading horror after my Mam let me stay up of a weekend to watch the Hammer Horror movies
I was reading James Herbert and Stephen King at that time and loved them. There is obviously a lot of violence in the books but that didnt bother me at all. I did feel a bit embarrased about the sex scenes if there were any, not because I was reading something that bothered me but more if my Dad had found out
He would have had a bird!I read fantasy now because I got through most of the horror novels by the time I was in my early 20's
And I really enjoy the genre but at times it does seem a bit tame compared to the stuff I was reading as a kid.I think what I am trying to say is that I didn't have any ill affects of reading this stuff or watching horror movies when I was younger. I remember watching horror movies that scared the living daylights out of my parents when I was in my mid teens, but didn't scare me at all
I can understand that parents need to know what their kids are reading and watching, but once my parents found out I was interested in the gritty stuff and that I wasn't fazed by it they felt quite relaxed about it.
Some kids are more mature than others
Thea
New Member
Oh boy! I'm not a parent, so I can't speak from that experience, but I can speak from the experience of growing up with two parents who never, ever dared to censor my reading. I'm sure they knew I'd get around it somehow. As a kid I had a book with me everywhere. I took two hour baths every night and read the entire time, continuing to fill the bath with more and more hot water as it started to cool down because I couldn't bear to put the book down in order to get out. I read while eating breakfast and dinner at home, and lunch at school. I read in the hallways between classes. If you saw me at all during that time, chances are my face was hidden behind a book, and at the age of 10 I was reading everything I could get my hands on: Salinger, Poe, H.G. Wells, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Wilde, Orwell, R.L. Stine, Christopher Pike, Nathaniel Hawthorne, Judy Blume, Ann M. Martin, Francine Pascal - from the classic to the incredibly superficial, stereotypical pre-teen delights, you name it; I was reading it.
Not only did I have this much freedom regarding books but also movies and video games. I saw the Exorcist and Rosemary's Baby before I'd hit the double digits, and I was reading about teenagers having sex before I'd even hit puberty. None of this stuff permanently damaged me, caused me to become promiscuous, depressive, addicted to drugs, violent, or anything like that. My imagination was constantly being fed by a variety of authors and filmmakers, and that eclecticism has followed me to this day.
The one and only time my parents ever considered banning me from watching something was when I was eight years old and they decided Saturday Night Live was too adult for me, because Kevin Nealon had used a naughty word. I was devastated because SNL was one of my favorite programmes (this was back when it was still funny), and when my parents saw how much it upset me and how much I was getting out of SNL they changed their minds and let me continue to watch it.
I know the kinds of parents who protect their children from anything that might seem remotely risky; these are the people who sent their poor son Drake off to summer camp with the rest of us kids, dressed in a homemade outfit with little duckies all over it. Please, people! Don't do this to your children!
I think that being treated as an adult, and always having been considered just as intelligent as any of my parents' adult friends, helped me immensely in cultivating self-confidence, self-awareness, and independence. Not only did my parents allow me to read whatever I chose, but they often bought me books that many of my friends' parents thought were too controversial, and encouraged me to discuss the subject matter with them! My parents trusted me, and had enough faith in my intelligence that I would do what I wanted and make the right decisions for myself.
I'm not trying to say "this is right" or "this is wrong" but "this is what worked for me, and I wouldn't have it any other way".
Not only did I have this much freedom regarding books but also movies and video games. I saw the Exorcist and Rosemary's Baby before I'd hit the double digits, and I was reading about teenagers having sex before I'd even hit puberty. None of this stuff permanently damaged me, caused me to become promiscuous, depressive, addicted to drugs, violent, or anything like that. My imagination was constantly being fed by a variety of authors and filmmakers, and that eclecticism has followed me to this day.
The one and only time my parents ever considered banning me from watching something was when I was eight years old and they decided Saturday Night Live was too adult for me, because Kevin Nealon had used a naughty word. I was devastated because SNL was one of my favorite programmes (this was back when it was still funny), and when my parents saw how much it upset me and how much I was getting out of SNL they changed their minds and let me continue to watch it.
I know the kinds of parents who protect their children from anything that might seem remotely risky; these are the people who sent their poor son Drake off to summer camp with the rest of us kids, dressed in a homemade outfit with little duckies all over it. Please, people! Don't do this to your children!
I think that being treated as an adult, and always having been considered just as intelligent as any of my parents' adult friends, helped me immensely in cultivating self-confidence, self-awareness, and independence. Not only did my parents allow me to read whatever I chose, but they often bought me books that many of my friends' parents thought were too controversial, and encouraged me to discuss the subject matter with them! My parents trusted me, and had enough faith in my intelligence that I would do what I wanted and make the right decisions for myself.
I'm not trying to say "this is right" or "this is wrong" but "this is what worked for me, and I wouldn't have it any other way".
Stalky
New Member
As for Harry Potter, I really enjoy the books, and it upsets me when Christians write it off based on what they've heard about it from other Christians, who have heard about it from someone who heard about it from James Dobson or somebody like that. Christians have to be really careful about not allowing their children to read certain books because they're afraid their children will turn away from their faith. Banning ideas is never right, because if the ideas really are wrong, then people have been given the power of reasoning and can decide for themselves. Children are people, and should be taught to decide for themselves what they believe and why. And it's kind of sad if Christian parents think their religion is so weak that it can't stand up to some young adult fantasy books.
On the other hand, there are some books that have adult content (you'll notice I said adult content, not adult ideas) that have no value whatsoever, except to polute the mind. Children don't benefit in any way from these books, and so although banning isn't a good solution, strongly suggesting that your children don't read whatever it is can be a very good idea. Because personally, I've always remembered what I've read in books more than I'd remember something from TV or a movie, and once you've read something there's no earasing it from your mind. Once there, always there. And after you've read enough of that kind of stuff, it can kind of build up in your imagination and distract you from more important things. Encouraging your kids to avoid things you think are inappropriate for their age level is not intolerance, sometimes it's just common sense.
On the other hand, there are some books that have adult content (you'll notice I said adult content, not adult ideas) that have no value whatsoever, except to polute the mind. Children don't benefit in any way from these books, and so although banning isn't a good solution, strongly suggesting that your children don't read whatever it is can be a very good idea. Because personally, I've always remembered what I've read in books more than I'd remember something from TV or a movie, and once you've read something there's no earasing it from your mind. Once there, always there. And after you've read enough of that kind of stuff, it can kind of build up in your imagination and distract you from more important things. Encouraging your kids to avoid things you think are inappropriate for their age level is not intolerance, sometimes it's just common sense.
M&O
New Member
censorship
Were you talking specifically about fantasy books? I happen to be a Christian parent who reads fantasy. But all fantasy books are not created equal. I have let my kids read the first Harry Potter, but have seen nightmares caused by the Wizard of Oz, so the other books in HP will have to wait (if I can help it ). Not because I think they will be wooed away from Christianity to witchcraft, but the tone and the events are pretty intense.
I believe you have a valid point about some Christians (or anyone, for that matter) basing their decisions on the appropriateness on third-hand opinions. However, the two sentences I quoted above are pretty sweeping statements to make about all Christian parents. Christian parents may think it reading material is inappropriate and not be afraid that it will turn their child away from faith.Stalky said:
Were you talking specifically about fantasy books? I happen to be a Christian parent who reads fantasy. But all fantasy books are not created equal. I have let my kids read the first Harry Potter, but have seen nightmares caused by the Wizard of Oz, so the other books in HP will have to wait (if I can help it
). Not because I think they will be wooed away from Christianity to witchcraft, but the tone and the events are pretty intense.
Stalky
New Member
I wasn't referring to fantasy books in particular - it could be anything, I suppose. And I agree with you that some reading material can be inappropriate, as opposed to causing kids to question their faith. When I said that, I was speaking from the point of view of a teenager from a Christian background who has witnessed firsthand the dangers of narrowmindedness. Sorry, my sarcasm got the better of me for a minute
M&O
New Member
S'awright
I had a quick reaction to your words partly because I agree with you-- that many Christians can be narrow-minded in the name of religion (dare I say, like the Pharisees they would be quick to comdemn?). And as a Christian it bugs me that it seems like "that kind" of Christian is what many people think all Christians are like.Stalky said:... I was speaking from the point of view of a teenager from a Christian background who has witnessed firsthand the dangers of narrowmindedness. Sorry, my sarcasm got the better of me for a minute
M&O said:
It seems to me, that with harry potter specifically, a little education would go a long way.
Any pagan/witch/wiccan can tell you that (aside from the instant spell thing) there is little similarity with HP and witchcraft. For example in wicca and witchcraft, EVERYONE is a witch. Moreso, wiccans follow the rede when says "do no harm" (pretty much like drs!), so the whole spellcasting thing on each other wouldn't go down well.
Mind you, having said all that might put wicca in a better light *laughs* and make it MORE dangerous.
M
member 737
Guest
If they are not, then who is?Abulafia said:
M&O
New Member
Before I was answering in theory; lately a real-life case has come up. My 10-year old daughter was talking with friends at school about their summer reading. Two of her friends recommended a book called Tilly by Frank Peretti (he is a Christian author, and she goes to a Christian school). She asked me to teach her how to use our library's online catalog to find it and then request it from interlibrary loan (I'm so proud!). I looked up the book on amazon.com later and discovered it is about a young married woman who had an abortion as a teenager. A few of the customer reviewers said that they had read the book when they were 9 or 10, and didn't really "get it" until they re-read it when they were older; one of the reviewers said that there was a graphic description of an aborted fetus that she judged inappropriate for that young an age.
Hmm. So, my first test. Thus far, my plan is to skim it looking for this alleged graphic portion to see what it is really like, and then...I dunno. I don't think I can see myself forbidding it, even if I think it is a rough passage. Maybe prep her for it ahead of time; maybe mark the page and tell her to talk to me about the book when she gets there.
Hmm. So, my first test. Thus far, my plan is to skim it looking for this alleged graphic portion to see what it is really like, and then...I dunno. I don't think I can see myself forbidding it, even if I think it is a rough passage. Maybe prep her for it ahead of time; maybe mark the page and tell her to talk to me about the book when she gets there.