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Poem: Seven Kisses

tugger

tugger

Member
SEVEN KISSES

1.
The passing of magic between.
Allotting the manna
From our separate heavens
To our one world insulated from all else.

2.
A brush, a touch,
A sexual caress in the sounds from our throats.

3.
Pausing to gaze
The magic moving back and forth,
Back and forth,
Back and forth.
Your eyes.

4.
Passing wet tongues’ taste
To the other
In this kiss, lingering.
Presenting our selves
In this kiss, breathing.

5.
Sighing our souls
To the other.

6.
To the other letting our lips be.
Enchanted mystery.

7.
Passing the magic
From your heart to my heart until
I am lost in you on fire.

-- tugger
 
Number one I'm flattered :eek:

And number 2, did TMG teach you that lurking trick or is it something you picked up all on your own? :D

RaVeN
(oh, your work is very moving and thought provoking as usual) :cool:
 
good stuff :) Don't like it as much as the others you have posted, but still good!!!

Keep posting, please!

Regards
SillyWabbit
 
Can I be honest with you? Oh, yes – we’ve cleared that up before, haven’t we? :)

I found the numbers distracting, and I would like an explanation as to why you put them in. *curious*. However, anything to please. We’ll do it your way ;)

1. The first stanza didn’t do it for me, but that’s just me. You know by now that I’m not good with heavenly thoughts ;)
2. Stanza two came in too quickly for me. Talking about sex before you made eye contact – tsk tsk – maybe a male thing? :rolleyes:
3. I love stanza three. Love it! You say ‘gaze’ as if it’s constant eye contact, but then you say ‘back and forth’ three times, which makes me think of shyness, uncertainty, hesitance. I prefer that to boldness. Again, maybe that’s just me :eek:
4. Stanza four. I would prefer it without the ‘wet’ word. Maybe that would upset your rhythm, Poet? :eek: As you know, I don’t do this technically. But when reciting it aloud, I prefer it without ‘wet’.
5. Overall, for me, I love stanzas, (stanzae?), stanzas, three to seven, but with slightly less gooshy kissing ;)
6. Especially loved the last line, especially ‘I am lost in you’, because that is a phrase I have used myself, when writing, when we reach that, erm, particular moment.

Is it okay to dissect your poetry like this? Seriously. Because I am interested to see if I am interpreting it correctly, but I don’t want to have you chomping the walls because some idiot in Scotland is getting you completely wrong. :(

Third Man Girl
 
RaVeN said:
did TMG teach you that lurking trick or is it something you picked up all on your own? :D
Click to expand...

RaVeN. I'm getting cross with you :mad: What is this lurking business? Tell me! Tell me, NOW! :mad:

Third Man Girl
 
third man girl said:
RaVeN. I'm getting cross with you :mad: What is this lurking business? Tell me! Tell me, NOW! :mad:

Third Man Girl
Click to expand...


Maybe I will...


*twiddles his thumbs*


and maybe I won't


*whistles"If You're Happy and you Know it , Clap your Hands" :D

RaVeN
 
RaVeN said:
Maybe I will...


*twiddles his thumbs*


and maybe I won't
Click to expand...

Wabbit, for a munchy-crunchy carrot, will you tell me?

Litany, for a fetching pair of fluffy slippers, with concealed miniature-spork sheaths, will you tell me?

Ashlea, for the complete anthology of Viggo's poems, signed, will you tell me?

Phil_The Englishman, for a sparkling new warehouseman's trolley, with alloy wheels and locking wheel nuts, will you tell me?

Martin, for a second Mini, to complete your 'His 'n' Hers' set for your girlfriend, will you tell me?

Poet, for little-bitty, teasy-weasy
HOY! If you're not Tugger, you have no business reading this!
, will you tell me?

Will, somebody please tell me.

Third Man Girl
 
Sure, for anyone else you offer them treasures. You even go so far as to tell Phil you'll sparkle his locking wheel nuts. :D

But what do I get? Nothing! Nothing but threats and little "mad" faces.

RaVeNs have feelings too ya know! :(

RaVeN
 
third man girl said:
No. He was too busy spitting blood :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:

Third Man Girl
Click to expand...

HAHAHA... That just makes you more cute :p

RaVeN
(Who learned a LONG time ago how to smile through boody teeth) :D
 
RaVeN said:
HAHAHA... That just makes you more cute :p
Click to expand...

Flattery will get you nowhere. I am highly suspicious of flattery. It implies that you want something that I have got, when; in fact, you have got something that I want; ie the answer to the question; the question being - what is this LURKING business. And why doesn't the Wabbit know the answer? Don't you guys stick together?

I refuse to be :mad: any longer. You are getting far too much pleasure from it ;)

Third Man Girl
 
third man girl said:
Flattery will get you nowhere. I am highly suspicious of flattery. It implies that you want something that I have got, when; in fact, you have got something that I want; ie the answer to the question; the question being - what is this LURKING business. And why doesn't the Wabbit know the answer? Don't you guys stick together?

I refuse to be :mad: any longer. You are getting far too much pleasure from it ;)

Third Man Girl
Click to expand...


Aww common. Be mad some more :(

BTW, I wouldn't be too flattered if I were you. This is the same guy that think's Phil's ass is cute, remember? :D

RaVeN
 
And another thing... :D

I complimented Wabbit on his poems. Does that mean that I want something he's got? (okay, that carrot of his would be nice)

Just because I said that you're cute when you're mad doesn't mean I'm on the attack.

Shame Shame Shame on YOU! :cool:

RaVeN
 
Excellent... They don't suspect our plans of world domination, ushering in a new age of the carrot! mmm... mmm... HAHAHAHAHAAHAHA!!!

<--mad me. I am. Really. Loopy.

Regards
Silly ( not taking over the world at all ) Wabbit
 
RaVeN said:
doesn't mean I'm on the attack.
Click to expand...

On the attack? Wow! That sounds quite scary :( What do you mean, on the attack? Is this an American euphemism for something? What would you be attacking, assuming you were attacking something - which you aren't (apparently)? :)

*curious*

Third Man Girl
 
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