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Today Was A Bad Day For Me:

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I'm sorry you are in so much pain Carlos. I can only imagine how it affects you and your relationships with family and friends. You are brave to share your pain in this public manner. It can only help diffuse the pain a little bit for you.
Following your doctor's instructions and keeping on your medication, and also being constantly on guard is your only hope of living a normal life.
I wish you all the luck in the world.
 
Hmm. I'm beginning to understand something here about the interest in you, Carlos. I've been around this forum for a long time, but I never was quite able to place why you elicited so much attention, and why you needed to create so many userids on the same forum. Maybe our astrological signs demand that we don't benefit from each other's company, but we're here now.

Your health as you described needs treatment. From bg's link you've clearly experienced this before, but suffered a relapse? Either way, I respectfully would suggest that you concentrate on getting yourself better first.

I have plenty of problems but I'm under no illusion that they will be solved from airing them over the internets. Repeatedly. I come here to talk about other things beside the problems, not about them.

Please get help. You've seen posts of support from here and elsewhere before. These messages are the same everywhere and every time you've posted your troubles.

Your friends will still be here, awaiting good news.
 
Peder said:
I've read the article and, though it is informative, the (only) consructive advice I can extract from it is that you should be in close contact with a knowledgeable health care provider and should scrupuously follow his advice and take his prescribed medications -- the same advice as for anyone with a serious condition, and yours sounds serious. I know you've heard that advice over and over by now, but our well-wishes will carry you only so far. You are the one who has to stick with staying out of difficulty.
And in that I wish you well.
From personal observation I know it isn't easy.
Sincerely
Peder
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I have been with treated by the same specialist for over eight years now.
 
Oh you guys think that in that moment, when my head exploded into madness, that I did so with normality. Oh please...you guys should know, by now, an episode when you read one. I've been having episodes here at BAR a zillions times in the past. That's at the core of my poor standing in this forum.

Tell me you knew that...right?
 
Author said:
Apology? For having an extremely horrific episode? Confused. Explain...
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No, an apology to that nice woman on the other forum you said not very nice things about. That place put up with your shenanigans for a long time and your payback to them was quite unkindly and quite ungentleman-like.
 
I PMed her to do just that and she brushed me off. That was a monster mental breakdown for which I have no control over. Does being apologetic for words used during such harsh mental hold any merit? Now if I said that I do such deed with stable intension, then I would not hesitate to spell my sorrow and apology at once.

But regardless, she has cast me away; that choice was the result of a mental breakdown. That's vital fact to accept as truth...because it is folks. I become a monster at moments, and when I enjoy brief moments of sanity I am mister mellow yellow -- truly!
 
I love Michy. Don't get me wrong. I was mad -- under the wicked spell of a mental breakdown. It's not as if I can control such acts, for words cannot precisely defined such deep pain.
 
Try again.

Since your insult was public, it's only fair that your apology be so as well. Not an excuse, an apology.
 
Author said:
Yes, good for you: I needed that time out. Good move.
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You weren't banned for your sake, Carlos, just like you weren't "cast away" from the other site. You were banned because the way you acted towards other people was way beyond what's tolerable. You were let back on under the assumption that you'd learned not to repeat that. I understand that you're ill, and I do feel for you, but I repeat that we cannot help you with that; saying that you simply "become a monster at moments" and that's just something we'll have to put up with is not an argument in your favour.
 
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