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Let's talk about people.

Lovecraftian

Lovecraftian

Active Member
I love sharing, and I think that human relations are the core of just about everything that matters to humans. Someone can have all the cash in the world but if he's unhappy with his wife or friends or is under some other type of human pressure, he won't be happy. We have to come first; everything else is a by-product of how we treat ourselves and others. I guess that sounds weird. Maybe.

I’d also like to hear more about your profession (MsBlueEyzz ). Having a master’s in the psych field is no joke to me; in fact, it’s uber-cool. I have a dime-store master’s in psych, and I’m proud of it. That’s another long story, but the short version is that I would frequently screw around and dip into stores at my last job, the main one being the used bookstore. I had gotten it into my head that I would be a psychologist and help people, so I began buying used psych books and reading the hell out of them.

I read these things cover-to-cover and would go get more. To be honest, there is no other field nearly as fascinating to me as studying the human mind. I fully believe that if more people took a few psych classes or read a few books they would be able to solve many, many more of the problems in their lives. Almost all of our problems stem from us, initially, and our gut reaction is to become angry and blame others.

Once we move past that, it’s like existing in another realm. Sure, other people do things that bother us or hurt us, and we cannot control them, but we can control our reactions to them, and that’s a huge part of the key to human success to me.

ANY-how, /ramble. Damn, ya got me doing it again.
 
I think first off people need to realize that they should not be trying to attain happiness as that is a such a fleeting emotion. It is contentment that I strive for. Contentment encompasses anything that comes my way..good or bad..If I can still feel content with where I am in my life then all is "okay."
I LOVE to talk about my profession, so this will be fun :) My Master's degree is in Professional Counseling so there is more emphasis on counseling versus Psychology. My undergrad degree is in Psychology, so I did mix it up a bit :)
You are right that really all of our problems stem from how we react to certain situations or the circumstances that are in our lives. It is our reaction that is the key. I do believe that with enough analysis, processing and work you can make it through (most of) what is in your life.
I will ramble for the long haul on this ha ha
 
You bet. I’m largely a happy guy, always have been. It takes a whole, whole lot to get me down. I believe in energy. Energy is the foundation of everything, and I’m not just talking about an Einstein/scientific level. I tend to be real intuitive, and I can sense energy coming from people very easily. Most times, they don’t even know they are giving it off. Well, I guess that’s a whole other rant. :D

But yes, for basic human psychology, we are the masters of our own, well, everything. I think that a lot of scientists and psychologists aren’t real religious for just that reason. I find never-ending fascination in people. I really do. We are predictably unpredictable, and for that I am thankful. :)
 
I am a content person :) I find happiness in a lot of things. I smile and laugh a lot. There is never a lot of time between my laughing or at least smiling. Although at times I think some people think that my intelligence is lower than it is because I have a great sense of humor. Now that would be another topic :)
I do sense energy from others. At its most basic form I can sense negative and positive energy. I have had to cultivate myself so that they do not affect me in a manner I don't wish them to.
I don't think people necessarily want to take ownership for their own feelings because then they are in charge and have to work to change it. If I were to say that I am a product of my childhood then it really is just placing the blame on something outside of myself and making certain that I do not have to work to change it. "It is out of my hands."
Religion is certainly another topic that I usually don't discuss too often for it is a deep belief for some and people want to defend that to the end. I personally do not have a religion. I do not judge those that do though. It is up to that individual. I support my clients where they are and try to help them within their boundaries. Unless it impedes their growth-then I will at least mention my observation to them.
 
Oh, you bet! I’ve been a senior administrator on a chess-playing site for years and years, and one cardinal rule we never allow the members to break is to talk about religion. There’s nothing inherently wrong with it, but the conversations quickly turn to debates which quickly turn to heated arguments and nasty words being flung about like dirty socks. I never, ever discuss politics or religion unless I’m having beers with trusted friends, in person, or I find someone online who can actually accept other views without becoming a poo-throwing monkey by the end of it.

And you are correct about the ownership bit. Folks don’t like to be in charge. The ones who do like to be in charge may not even realize they are in charge.

I heard something, years ago, that stuck with me and bothers me a bit to this day. It went something like:

Don’t be too harsh on people; they are all doing the best they can.

I just *have* to argue with this, logically. If we were all doing the best we actually can, I think there’d be a whole lot more success stories. Which begs the question: What IS the best we can? What’s the variable.

It can only be personality and experience. Otherwise, we’d all be the same person and that would be no fun – unless everybody were me. That would rock, of course. :D
 
I am the same with religion. It is because for some that is their deep beliefs and who is to say what one believes is wrong? That is unless it is affecting their life in a very negative manner (but then I am not talking about religion there, but more mental illness). Then if one has a mental illness they need some sort of help in handling their lives.
People don't like to be in charge many times simply because of the fact that then you have no one to blame but yourself. WOW!! ha ha
I have to agree with your logic with that quote. I am not doing the best I can. If I were then I would be much more successful in many areas of my life. Instead I am trying to balance my wants, needs and those of others around me. It is not easy, but I will admit I am not doing my best.
The variable would change depending on what you are measuring. If you are measuring the best (fill in the blank). You almost have to have a specific thing you are stating. "I am the best cook" differs from "I am the best wrestler." Different variables are included in these. We are not perfect, and we certainly are not trying to attain the best in everything.
Personality can be changed depending on how that person wants to change. If I don't like something about myself then I have the power to change it. As far as experience, that would all depend on what I am exposed to. Unfortunately, we are not all exposed to the same things and therefore our perceptions are different.
I would not even want one other me because then there would be too much competition :rofl:
 
Baha, true that!

I actually took Intro to Psych a couple of years ago. While it was interesting, the teacher was bashing Freud any time she could, and I thought that was just wrong. Not all of Freud’s concepts hold true today, no, but he was a-correction-THE trailblazer for psychology having to do with the formative years, something I believe very strongly in.

If I had grown up with a different family in another country, there is just simply no way I would be exactly the guy I am today. Also, to bring it back to the chess stuff, kids who learn serious chess before age ten almost always go on to become powerful masters. Those of us who learned later in life don’t have a chance, because we learn differently as adults than we did as kids.

That’s why it’s SO, so important to be very careful what children are exposed to. They remember everything, believe that, and if it’s bad stuff well, that becomes a part of them, somewhere, even if it’s deep down. That idea scares the hell out of me, especially when I walk through a Wal-Mart and see the parents interactions with their children – yikes! Future convicts, they are. :p
 
Freud was not perfect by any means, but also we can see how the computer has developed. We laugh at the earlier computers, but also are amazed at how far we have come. We should be doing the same with psychology :)
The learning we do as a child is one that is making new pathways in our brains. As adults those pathways are already formed (or so it seems). We can alter them and grow new ones, but our brain is not as adaptable as an adult. We have so many memories and our brain has been used so much that it is difficult to learn as well as we did as children.
You are also talking about nature versus nurture. The long debate that will continue long into the future :)
 
Hey! Yer a poet and didn't know it! :D

Yup, that's true. I believe that, somewhere, we likely have the power to open those neropathways again, if we could only know how. Our minds are so powerful. If folks can walk on fire and broken glass without their feet hurting, I'm darn-well-sure that we can open up things in our mind and re-learn them.

You wait. I'll find out how. :p

But, on a serious level, I believe that to be possible. I may never be a chess master, but I always strive to be the best me I can, and I'm always trying to improve. That's something, eh?
 
Don't worry I won't quit my day job to become a poet :lol:

I believe it is true to open the pathways back up or at least to change them. It is not as though we can't learn new things in life. It is just more difficult for us to as we get older. Also our emotions get in the way.

When you find out, you had better share it with me :)

I think that to always be striving for our best is the path to be on. I tell my clients that. I know I am not perfect and I know I never will be, but what is stopping me from trying??
 
Right!

I have a credo that I pretty much live by:

Aim for better. You’ll get it.

If we are constantly improving a little each day, no matter what the endeavor, then we have no choice but to come close to perfection. We’ll never get there, but that shouldn’t stop us from improvement. Always improve.
 
To stop growing is to stop living. That is what I live by. I am always one to keep trying new things. I am also bad about trying to fit more and more things in to my life. You only live once (well, if that is your belief hee hee)
Those that are not content/happy in their lives are really not living.
 
You got that right. I’m pretty wild and crazy in real life. I’m the loud guy at parties who loves to tell a billion-and-one offensive jokes and drink too much beer. :D

But that’s just the one part of me. I’m a real positive thinker who has dreams and goals and is working semi-hard to reach them. Hey, at least I’m honest. Baha.
 
I have a loud laugh, so I am actually the person at the party that is just laughing and smiling. Everyone says I am very charismatic and that is why am so good with people.
Well, that and other reasons ha ha

Ahh, there is the honesty by saying you work semi-hard to achieve them. If you were to work at your hardest/best you would have attained more, but that would have been more so because of your experience. If I had gotten my Master's degree sooner in life, therefore been working in this field sooner, I would be a better counselor.
Well, either that or I would have been burnt out by now and hating everyone :rofl:
 
Or not ready for it at all. I believe that I decided to write professionally so late in life so that I could have all those experiences in between when I started college and now. I've seen and done some really bizarre things, and they all shape who I am today.

Had I started writing when I was, say, twenty-one, I may not have had the passion or the life-knowledge necessary to be any good.

I must say, your 'other reasons' is intriguing. :D
 
mmm...good point. Sometimes I need to remind myself that I was not ready fresh out of undergrad to go to grad school. I probably would not have been as good a counselor as I am today (not to say I am great). My life experiences certainly have helped shape me and helped with my counseling techniques.

:lol: Well, the other reasons shall remain a mystery...for now :devil:
 
Hold on, hold on. Two pages of intelligent, reasoned conversation between two equally reasoned and intelligent people... you do know this is BAR right?

Have either of you read Descartes' Error by Antonio Damasio? I found his writings about human emotions quite interesting. Quite especially of interest were the experiencing of emotions, and the discourse over whether we have the emotion then display our reaction to it first, or vice versa. All curious and intriguing stuff.

I'm fascinated by psychology, in regards to having a more general overview of what comprises us, the human, and society in general. I do wonder if we shouldn't study this subject more openly at schools from an earlier age, and am sure if we did we would generate a more emotionally mature and self-aware society.
 
Interesting! No, I have not!

I have, however, been told I should see your site/blog? I'm into the macabre fiction, both reading and writing. Weird Tales, Clive Barker, Lovecraft, etc.

Linky? :D

I'll look into that book, it sounds cool. :)

And yes, I feel the same as you do. If more people knew more about themselves and what makes them tick, I truly believe we'd have more happy people and more successful people. Nice people maybe, even.

Like Bill Cosby said: Hurt people hurt people. You can either give in, or fix yourself. I wish more folks chose the latter.
 
Link in my signature, or if you can't see that (I understand some folks have them turned off in forums) it's www.spooky-reads.com

Definitely recommend Decartes' Error! Can get heavy in spots (I found anyway), but was definitely worth pushing through.
 
Wow, I am having a derp moment -- sorry, didn't even look at the siggy. Thanks, man! :)

I should make a proper intro thread here. I likely will with morning coffee. :D
 
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