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My Dear Father is Dieing...

-Carlos-

New Member
He is currently in ICU on his death bed. Diabetes will end his life soon. His feet are so swollen that they need to be removed...but...in the condition he is in at the moment, that procedure will kill him- according to the doctor. The real bad news is that if his feet remain as they are, the infection will kill him as well.

He is conscience and aware but he can't speak because he has tubes down his throat (and all over his weak body) and he is legally blind at that. All we (family) can do is keep him as comfortable as possible. My mother is so sure of his demise that she told me to take have my black suit ready.

It is such a hard time for me right now. Thanks for listening.
 
May the good Lord sustain you and your family through this ordeal. You are in my prayers also.
 
Thank you each for your kindness.

When it comes to theology things, for me, turn vague. I am a naturalist/evolutionist mostly though I am warming-up (just slightly) to Buddhism. I was a highly faithful Christian man for over a decade (eleven years to be precise). Today I do not lean on such things for support during times of difficulty. I tend to be more clinical in my thinking.

Nonetheless I greatly appreciate all the love (in faith as well (prayers)) you guys have given me in this dramatic moment in my life. Thank you all once again. You are all very dear to me.

Carlos.
 
All day tomorrow my dad will be under the knife: both his legs will be amputated from the upper knee down and he will have a tracheostomy done as well. Because of his weak state there is a 50/50 chance that he won't make it.

I will be at the hospital all-day tomorrow hoping that he will come out of it fine.
 
AquaBlue, I am so sorry you are hurting. I know this is a difficult time for your family. Speak lovingly to your father as you hold his hand. Be strong for your mother. Grieving sucks ass. Find comfort with your family and friends.
 
Update: The bad news...my father no longer has legs and he has a hole in his throat. The good news...he's alive!
 
I am truly sorry, Aqua. It's hard watching people you love suffer. I wish you and your family all the best.
 
This afternoon the doctor we termed "the bad news guy" told us that we must start thinking about putting dad in a Hospice center.
 
My father had a brain hemorrhage. Pretty soon soon now we will very likely let him pass. Too much suffering. I am so very sad.
 
Good day today. I placed my hand into his and I told him that I love him. I then asked him that if he loved me too to squeeze my hand. He did so, hard too. Then I massaged his head and asked him to stick out his tongue if he enjoyed it, he stuck it out. It was a good day in the ICU today.
 
Today we talked with the funeral people and all is set and ready when needed. Tonight the doctor will go through the hospice entry procedure with us.
 
The dreadful words finally came out of the doctor's mouth, There is Nothing Else We Can Do.

Now we (my mom, older brother and me) have to make to final decision: (1) keep him alive in a Hospice (until he dies...slowly), or (2) unplug the machines.

I asked the doctor (more than once I think) if my father was suffering right now. He told me he might be...or...he might not be. He did not know the answer because even doctors can't magically communicate with unresponsive patients. So I asked him the same question but in another manner, So He Might Be Suffering Longer (at Hospice) if We Don't Pull the Plug? He was vague in his reply.

I do not, for a nanosecond, want my dad to suffer more than he needs to. So my choice, a hard one indeed, is to give him mercy and take him off the machines ASAP.
 
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