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The Evil "Wish" Game

I wish that I owned a little fairy that granted all of my wishes.
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Granted but everyone in the world says 'I dont believe in faeries' at once and your faerie drops down dead as peter pan is off making babies with wendy!

I wish i knew what i wanted to do with my life.
 
Granted, but what you wanted to do was become a professional (American) football player, and you succeed, but right before your first match, you get hit by a car going 90 mph and can never play the game again.

I wish my hair wasn't curly and unmanageable!
 
Granted, but the foreign accent is due to the fact that they live on the opposite side of the world, and neither of you have the means to ever meet in person.

I wish that someday I will win a Nobel prize.
 
Granted, but you're later discovered to have plagiarized the work that got you the prize and are left in ruins.

I wish I had a black kitten with fairy wings.
 
Granted, but it decides to eat your legs one day and you never can walk again.

I wish I could finish writing a story longer than four pages. >.<
 
Granted, but she's ugly and annoying and you have nothing in common, and when you try to break up with her she goes psycho and hurls a javelin through your chest so no one else can have you.

I wish I could finish my art project and move onto something else.
 
Granted. But I wouldn't rush it if I were you the real world isn't all it's cracked up to be.


I wish I could have the guts to tell annoying people just how irritating they are. :mad:
 
stephiebaby said:
Granted. But I wouldn't rush it if I were you the real world isn't all it's cracked up to be.
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Yeah, I know, but most of friends are juniors, so I want to be with them.


I wish I could have the guts to tell annoying people just how irritating they are. :mad:
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Granted, but you tell your husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend (I'm covering all possiblilities here!) that they are much too talkative, and they never speak to you again.

Valkyrie, I would RATHER have no hair than this crap on my head! :D

I wish that I could have a new wardrobe because my old one has so little choice.
 
Granted, but your new wardrobe was passed down to you in the will of a very flamboyant gay man, and you are embarrassed to go to school looking like a drag queen.

I wish that someone would ask me to prom.
 
Granted, but when you get there, his ex-girlfriend shows up and beats you to a pulp. (wow I had fun imagining that ;))

I wish I had hi-speed internet instead of this dial-up crap!
 
Granted, but your Dad gets viruses on the computer looking at porn, and your mom blames you, and grounds you for the rest of eternity. (Funny, I had fun imagining that too...)

I wish I had a goldfish.
 
Granted, but like all gold fish you find it floating in hte bowl the next day, after it died mysteriously.

i wish i could spell mysteriously.....
 
Granted, but soon after you learn the present spelling, the English dictionary is revised to never have the word "mysteriously" spelled the same again. Instead it is spelled "misteriously." You then are promoted to the Scripps National Spelling Bee, and to win, you need to spell "misteriously" in the new fashion. Spelling it in the old fashion, you become a laughingstock of the entire world, people throw tomatoes at you when you walk down the street, you change your name to Abby Jones, and move to Antarctica to study penguin migration. While down there, you are caught in a humongous blizzard and freeze to death in the cold, barren wasteland, where no one ever finds your body. The lovely penguins that you studied soon ingest your slowly rotting flesh as you watch from Heaven in gruesome detail, cringing at the sight. :)eek: I didn't know I was that EVIL!)

ValkyrieRaven88 said:
Funny, I had fun imagining that too...
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I'm sure you did, watching my dad there! ;) (Actually he doesn't even know how to use our computer!)

I wish that a certain 13-year-old psychopathic girl would quit stalking me. (Her name is Taylor.)
 
Granted, but she begins to stalk your girlfriend instead, proclaiming her undying love for her, and your girlfriend becomes convinced that it's your fault and you're a two-timing jerk, so she walks out on you, but before she does, she puts dog poop in a paper bag on your front porch and lights it on fire, then takes pictures of you in nothing but your boxer shorts and poop-covered slippers and posts copies all over town, and to top it all off...it goes in the yearbook, and every time you look back on your high school memories, the whole incident is hanging over all the good times like a huge, black shadow.

(Can I be evil, too?)

I wish I could learn foreign languages overnight.
 
Granted, but in doing so, you forget English, and for some reason are unable to learn it over. Then, the FBI believes you to be an illegal immigrant and sends you off to Mexico. You cannot get back and spend the rest of your life working in a clothing factory pushing a button for 10 pesos an hour. (That's like what 5 cents or less!)

I wish I could sing pretty....
 
A sensible wish. *grin*

Granted, but you are castrated and wind up singing soprano the rest of your life, and little kids kick you and make mean jokes about you when you put on your choir robe.

I wish I had an advance copy of the seventh Harry Potter book to read.
 
Doesn't everybody!!!

Granted. But now it's over and you don't have anymore to read...All good things come to those who wait.




I wish I could successfully make it in the acting industry.
 
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